Top Seven Most Reliable Signs Of Mutual Attraction Between Two People

Top seven most reliable signs of mutual attraction between two people. So if you have ever wondered whether someone is interested in you on some level, especially a romantic level, if you've been on a first date, if you've just met them and you're trying to work out what kind of attraction there is there, these are the seven things that realistically are going to give you a really good clue on that.

So my name is Stephen Frost, I am the founder of Marriage Matching here in Osaka, Japan. We are a specialist marriage agency. We help people to find marriage partners on a regular basis. We also help with dating coaching to make sure that people get into the right mindset for attracting the right partner, and help them to overcome things so that the whole process of dating can work smoothly for them.

So, what are the seven signs? Reliable signs? Most reliable signs, should I say, of mutual attraction between two people? Well, the first one sustained eye contact and intense gazing. What we are talking about here is more than just a few seconds of sustained eye contact. We're talking about longer periods, potentially into the minutes. Naturally, you need to be really careful if someone is just staring at you and they're giving you a hard stare, very, very different signal, want to be very wary of that. When you are looking at this kind of thing with the eye contact, you need to calibrate on the other micro expressions which are there, especially on a facial level for positivity, for happiness, for that kind of excitement.

When there is a general positive flow behind someone's facial expression, and they're holding eye contact with you, that is a really, really strong indicator. Those quick glazes, gazes as well. They can be another one if they keep looking down and then flicking back up to your eyes and then flicking away. There can be a sense of nervousness in behind that as well, but again, calibrating with the positivity those micro expressions, smiles, things like that, that kind of eye contact, that kind of gazing, very, very good indicator. So that is number one.

Number two unconscious mirroring of body language. Now what we're talking about here is how their physiology relates to yours. So as a brief example on this one if the right shoulder, if your right shoulder this is, is down and your left shoulder is up, and they are basically dropping their left shoulder down and putting their right shoulder up, then basically that is going to be mirroring.

Now if your right shoulder is down and your left shoulder is up and they have got their right shoulder down and their left shoulder is up, what they're basically doing is matching, which is slightly different. You need to be looking out for mirroring. It's essentially like looking at in a mirror, as the whole expression says, mirroring, looking at yourself in a mirror, but basically there is a different person there looking back at you. Now the shoulders is one thing, other things that can be doing head off to an angle, things that you're doing, folding your arms, folding your legs, those kind of things. You need to be looking at, which leg, which arm is and what position, those kind of things.

Those can be simple-ish ones. Other stuff which starts to get into the more intense side of the mirroring is when you've got things like breathing rate, which is matched, that is very, very difficult to calibrate on. You need to be looking at things like the movement of the shoulders, the movement of the chest. But obviously if you're staring at someone's chest, especially if they're female, it's going to start getting uncomfortable.

So holding a look on the shoulder, checking for rise and flow with the breathing that's going to give you a more reliable feedback in terms of what's happening with their breathing in relation to yours. But again, be very, very careful. If someone starts to feel that you are just literally staring at them in an uncomfortable way, it's going to break rapport and close things off. So unconscious mirroring of body language physiology, check for it subtly, check for it carefully, and make sure when you do, there is a positive air around everything that you're doing. So that is number two.

So number three magnetic physical proximity and leaning in. This is when you've almost got like a gravitational field between you. It's basically drawing you in closer together, and you're finding yourself closing that distance. It could be that you're in a loud place and you're leaning in so that you can understand each other more. You could still be in a quiet space and leaning in closer, which creates a more intimate feel behind things as well. What is essentially going on is that proximity, that draw, it’s because you want to know each other more deeply, okay. There is a sense of implied trust that exists within that as well, because people rarely get close to people that they don't trust, they maintain a distance, indeed they can actually create more distance. So when they're actually closing that distance, there is a sign of trust there. There is a sign of attraction. So, that is number three to be looking out for, magnetic physical proximity and leaning in.

So, what is number four? Number four, natural effortless laughter and smiling. Fairly, fairly simple this one, self-explanatory. When someone is smiling at you, they are indicating happiness. Naturally, there could be something else going on in their mind which they're thinking about, they could be uncomfortable around you and doing something, thinking about something else, in their mind. So you need to calibrate on other things with facial expressions, around the eyes especially, other things to do with what they're doing with their hands, their arms can indicate this as well. So, when you have got the natural laughter coming through with it as well, as opposed to nervous laughter, nervous laughter generally not such a good thing, when you've got natural laughter, that ease, that relaxation, that comes through it. So again, this comes with the smiling as well, when they have got a relaxed expression and relaxed body physiology, and they're smiling, they're laughing along with you, that is a really, really good sign of attraction. You are hitting things on a level, you are resonating together and it is showing through. So that is number four, natural, effortless laughter and smiling.

So number five, nervous energy and fidgeting. Interesting one this one, and again you need to be very, very careful when you're calibrating on this one, because nervous energy can come from a number of different things, and it can show in a number of different things. It can be because someone feels uncomfortable in a negative way, and they are wishing they were someone else, somewhere else, or even someone else for that matter. When you have got nervous energy and fidgeting coming through on a positive level, again you're checking for other micro expressions for smiles, things like that, this does tie in then very closely with things like the gazing as well. When someone is looking away, they've got that kind of nervousness around them, and then they're flicking up to have a look and they're all “oh, yeah, oh”, that kind of thing with the nervous energy, that fidgeting, that is a positive sign. There is an excitement there. There is something that they want to progress with you. They’re just unsure how to do it, or whether you're going to do it, and what the next steps are, but there is definitely a level of attraction there. So, nervous energy, fidgeting, a good sign, but you need to be very careful when you are calibrating on it, especially checking out for things like gazing and other signs of positivity within their expressions.

So, number six subtle meaningful touch and physical connection. So this is before you get to the hand-holding stage, generally. This is when potentially you've got your hand on the table or it's on a seat beside you and they are reaching on, they are brushing very generally before pulling their hand back, that kind of thing, or maybe they've got it there and they're just resting very gently.

If you're something like a ball game or whatever, it can be that you've just got your hand on your leg and they kind of reach over and they're just kind of maintaining a little bit of contact there, just a little bit and then pulling away again. It's in those early stages, that gentle physical touch. That's what you're looking out for.

People very, very rarely initiate physical contact unless they feel comfortable with someone, in a social setting that is. Obviously if you're in a business setting, you've got things like handshakes, pats on the back, that kind of thing. When you are in a social setting, especially one where there's potential for romance, that kind of thing, that kind of physical connection, it only happens when someone is displaying interest on some level. Naturally, do check for other expressions, check for tonal quality within voice, those kind of things. It can be that someone is feeling nervous or scared in some way and they're looking for support. It can be that there is just an attraction and they want to create that little bit more closeness so that you can elevate things to a higher level with the relationship with them. So, that is number six.

So, number seven, and this is when it starts to get very obvious as well, so, seeking each other out and basically looking for exclusive attention. When someone is directly coming to you and they're saying “yes, I want to see you more” and things along the lines of “well, actually, I'm not so interested in talking to other people.” or “I'm not so interested on going on dates with other people. I think I'd just like to spend more time with you.” Really, really clear, signal, very, very clear signal that there is attraction on their behalf. Naturally, if it's coming through from you as well, you have got a mutual attraction there, which is a really, really good thing. Of course, and again, taking any of these signals solo never a wise thing, you want to calibrate on other things that basically have them meshing in together to create a complete picture. So, if someone is seeking you out and basically saying that they want exclusive attention with you, check for the other things. Check for things like especially the eye contact, check for the physical contact as well, all of those kind of things.

The natural nervous laughter to get, or natural laughter together, can be some natural nervous laughter as well. If they're combining in with that whole kind of fidgeting and the nervous energy as well. But you're checking for that whole positive quality behind all of these things when you are assessing for attraction. Once you've got all of that stuff together, the likelihood is there is a really good sense of attraction between you and then obviously mutual attraction is there.

So, what are the top seven most reliable signs of mutual attraction between two people? Well, number one, sustained eye contact and intense gazing. Number two unconscious mirroring of body language physiology. Number three magnetic physical proximity and leaning into each other. Number four natural effortless laughter and smiling. Number five nervous energy and fidgeting. Number seven, sorry, number six, got to learn to count, subtle meaningful touch in physical condition, and number seven seeking each other out and exclusive attention. When you've got all of that stuff coming in together, really, really good indications that there is mutual attraction between you. My name again, Stephen Frost. I hope you have found this useful. If you are looking for any further guidance on this, please do reach out to us at Marriage Matching for a dating coach or help in finding a partner and we would be happy to assist. Thank you.

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