Is Dating The Same Thing As Being In A Relationship?

Is dating the same thing as being in a relationship? Good question, one worth knowing the answer to very definitely so you can avoid any pitfalls with dating, relationships, and love. My name is Stephen Frost, I am the founder of Marriage Matching here in Osaka, Japan. So, dating, relationships, a lot of people think that there is a fuzzy difference between the two.

A lot of people think that if you are just dating someone, you're not actually in a relationship with them. There is a solid point of reality which is coming very shortly on this. When you know someone very simply, you have a relationship with them. Whether they are an acquaintance, whether they are a friend, or whether they are a significant other, a life partner, a lover, or whatever, you have a relationship with them. Pure and simple.

So, by virtue of the fact that you are dating someone, you have an elevated relationship status with them. You have become more significant to them. There is a romantic interest attached or a physical interest attached, depending on what kind of dating you are doing, the purpose and intent of your dating. This essentially means that yes, if you're dating someone, you are in a relationship with them.

So make zero mistakes about that. When you are dating, you are in a relationship. Now this is where a lot of people start to look at kind of fuzzy differences around dating and relationships. A lot of people only classify themselves as being in a relationship when it gets to a serious stage, when there is a point of commitment between the two people.

That is what most people find to be a defining factor between dating and relationships. The reality, however, is that as soon as you are dating someone, you are in a relationship with them, be it a casual one or a more serious one. Again, I mentioned earlier about intent and how intent affects relationships and dating. So if you have different intents, that is, you and your partner have a different intent.

If your partner is very much feeling like they are in love with you, if they think that you are the ideal one for them, for life and for marriage, yet you are more interested in something casual, if you just want to have fun, so to speak. Yes, you are in a relationship, the reality is you have different intents and different purposes behind dating.

So, what does this mean? The reality again behind this, if you drill down deeper and further, is that when you are dating with someone, when you are getting to know someone, when you are in an early stage relationship with someone, even in a later stage relationship with someone, communicate with them. Make sure that they understand your intent and you understand their intent as well.

Never, ever mislead someone. Never actually misinform them about what you're looking for within a relationship or what you're actually desiring from dating. It's never going to serve either of you well at all, okay. You need to be completely upfront with what you think, and what you want. Could it lead to uncomfortable conversations? Could it lead to an end in dating or relationship with that person?

Yes, absolutely it could. Zero bare bones about that one whatsoever.

That said, what is going to be good if something is going to be incompatible in a level with the two of you for a relationship, when you're wanting different things, it is better to know that earlier on, and for things to potentially naturally come to a close, because it will lead to the situation where the two of you can naturally move on to finding the person that is right for each of you.

There are some people out there who find the right person first time, and certainly I have known people throughout my life and have had contact with people who have just known from across the room when they've seen someone that they are the one, and it’s the first person they've dated, and they have gone on to marry. Unfortunately, those are rare circumstances, yet they do happen.

The reality for most people is that they need to go through iterations of dating, getting to know different people, and while some can be a very, very close approximation to ‘the one’, there can be things in around that person that lead them to a situation where it's better to actually move on and gravitate closer and closer to the one. Provided you work through dating in that way, provided you can be honest with yourself when you're in a situation with someone, whether it's casual dating or serious dating, when you can be honest with yourself about whether or not that person is going to be right for you, for life, you are going to find it far more easy to actually connect with the right person for you, for life. When you hold on to things which are working in a less than effective manner in terms of love and relationship satisfaction, you are just going to cause stress for both yourself and the other person involved. By being able to let go, by being able to move forward, you can actually find the right person and someone who is actually going to be a joy to actually spend your life with.

So, my name again, Stephen Frost, I am the founder of Marriage Matching here in Japan. We help people find partners naturally and also help with dating coaching to get mindset in the right shape. The difference between dating and relationship? Well, pure and simple, if you are dating, you are in a relationship. You can be in a relationship without dating someone.

But if you're dating, you are definitely in a relationship. Pure and simple. The reality again behind this, just to reiterate on what I've said before, is that basically the thing that occurs deeper behind this is intent of each of you when you are dating, or when you are in a relationship. Once you've got alignment on your thinking, once you've got alignment on where you wish to be in life and what you want from relationships, it's going to be far easier for you to be in the right relationship and dating the right person.

Thank you.

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